Akademik

n.

The person with the most technological prowess in an office or department.

If in the unlikely event that Doug Looney doesn't give you enough about Jerry Tarkanian, starting on Page 42 this week, then now — on your way to checking out www.sportingnews.com, of course — you can stop in at Tark's site on the World Wide Web. Tark? An alpha geek? Hardly. "He doesn't even have a computer in his office,'' says son Danny, who takes care of the home page's content, which includes offers to buy, buy, buy Tark T-shirts, Tark's autobiography and Tark's video. The address: www.tarkanian.com.

— "Nothin' but Internet," The Sporting News, December 2, 1996

Those who study apes call the dominant member of the group the 'alpha male.' In the office or workplace, the most technically knowledgeable person often is called the alpha geek,' reports Wired magazine.

— "Handbook for Retirees Answers Big Questions," The Orlando Sentinel, October 26, 1995

I just don't understand why technology fans feel they have to create their own language. It's almost as if they want to preserve a veil of mystery around what they do. Or maybe they're just frustrated that no one uses pig Latin once they've reached puberty.

''Internet-enabled'' isn't even the worst example. There's ''alpha geek,'' a title bestowed upon a group's top technology expert.

— Chuck Paustian, "Let me put it this way: ix-nay the argon-jay," Business Marketing, September 1, 1995